Sometimes we are faced with a hard decision. You know, those times when we need to make a decision about something we don’t want to deal with. Because the situation sucks, or there’s no great answer, or because whatever we decide will make us the “bad guy”.

In those times, all is not lost.  There are a few things you can do to make yourself feel – at least – like you’ve got something on your side.

  • First, admit it’s not the place you want to be, that you’d rather it was a better one. And then let it go. It is what it is.
  • Then, take a look at how you got here. This isn’t about self-criticism, but about critical discernment.  There’s a difference: doing the first is self-abusive and not needed; the second is helpful.
  • Review your options. Write them out so that they’re clear.
  • Then consider each one based on how it affects you energetically: when you think about that choice, does it energize you or deflate you? Then choose the option that gives you the most energy.

One thing I do know: in the end, I want to feel I did the best I could. Because that will feed my soul and give me energy. Anything else will deplete it and use me up.



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Maryanne Nicholls is a Registered Psychotherapist.  To find out more, gain access to her weekly newsletter, meditations and programmes, sign up at .

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