Today I want to talk about referencing your past. I have many clients who are so focused on the past that they forget they are living in the now. I don’t want to shame someone’s past. In fact, what I do is help people understand their past, how it impacts current behaviors and associations, and then I help people realize what is deadening their ability to navigate the present.
Are the exercises fun or easy? Not necessarily. But, in many cases, understanding your past (without focusing on it or using it as an excuse to stand still) will help you become more aware of your environment and why you react to certain situations in a negative or positive manner.
I always start with helping people identify patterns based on present emotions. Let’s say you constantly feel jealous of other successful women. This current problem can make you feel anxious, angry and even cause you to self-sabotage yourself at work. Instead of focusing on constant panic or rage attacks, I will help you identify the pattern and where it stemmed from.
If your first job was working for a female boss who always shamed you and didn’t make you feel “good enough”, then of course your reactions to any successful women in today’s environment would be skewed. You shouldn’t address a successful women in your current life in the same manner you would react to the horrible female boss of your past. Yet, many of us carry our past into present life and we fail to separate the now environment from our prior circumstances.
I can help you with this. I can help you transcend the events of your past into the reasons why you react to certain situations with patterned behavior. We can talk about your tension and work with recall exercises to help you see and feel your full memory.
Again, if you were abused by men in your past, we would address this to help you become aware of how you are interacting with men in the present based on your past. Once this is identified through memory recall, and reliving the experience through associated recall exercises, we can correct negative behaviors within your current life. You can start to focus on building positive relationships with men and come to expect more from them vs. what your past has taught you. You will realize your current environment offers different outcomes and possibilities, which is essential for being in the now in order to move forward.
Are you ready to address your past so you can truly live a fulfilled life in the present? Are you ready to be aware of where you are today? If so, let’s talk! I can help!