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There are some people who refuse to let others help them. They make suggestions, but the other party doesn’t listen. The other party makes excuses that “Everything is fine” or “people do respond to me” and then they get no where. Well, being stuck personally and professionally is never easy to address- especially when the subject is yourself or your tunnel vision. Know this, addressing yourself and what you can be doing better can help you feel better about where your life is going versus wondering why things aren’t changing for you or blaming other people for lack of change in your life.

The best sign to discovering if you’re stuck is to ask yourself right now what it is you want. “Happy self” or “wonderful career” are blanket answers. Be specific. Can you really define what it is you want right now? Recognize that you have desires, goals, and beliefs that are important to you. Your values matter and when they shift, it is because something inside of you has awakened and is ready to experience more.

Another question you want to ask yourself in discovering if you’re truly your own problem (and stuck) is because your joy is gone. You may have become too focused on what you think you “should” do instead of what you really, truly want to do. Example, I knew a lady in business who followed her competitor’s every move. The competitor had more business then she did , so naturally she thought she should be doing what the competitor was doing… only she had NO business. The problem was she wasn’t listening to what her customers wanted, she was too focused on what she thought she should be doing. She had no business and she was unhappy- not a way to live.  I also know many people who are stuck in unhappy marriages because they were brought up being told they “should” get married. They are not happy, they are only pleasing other people. Again, not a way to live and it leads to being stuck.

Turn things around with baby steps. Focus on asking yourself what it is that you want to do and be detailed about the answer. Then focus on if you are joyful and doing what you love or if you are miserable and doing what you should do. There is a difference between the two- as well as the outcome. Then focus on what you are going to do from this day forward by starting with the baby steps. Get comfortable being uncomfortable. If you want to grow, you have to allow yourself to be uncomfortable; all growth requires discomfort, but it is worth it. Yes, start small and then move on to the big stuff. The point is to address yourself and then focus on considering change and then making that change!

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