THE BRAVELY BALANCED BLOG
For the overachiever and the overworked!
How exhausted are you? I know the feeling!
Does being exhausted serve you? What if I told you that you could have it all without subjecting yourself to hustle culture?
Sounds divine, doesn’t it? Follow along and feel the ease!
Owning Your Expertise: A Personal Journey Beyond Imposter Syndrome
A lot of people feel they are a fraud. Even Maya Anjelou felt that way sometimes. Members of traditionally underrepresented groups tend to feel this more. There are lots of motivational talks, books and videos that can help you if you suffer from this.
I spent an entire week of teaching and listening to others teach. For the first time ever, I can honestly say I did not feel even a touch of imposter. …
Behavioural Ripples: Understanding the Impact of Our Emotions on Others
When we feel badly, we behave badly, often without knowing it.
I’m pretty sure all customer service reps understand this: the customer is already feeling badly and the less mature ones frequently try to take it out on the rep.
I was at one time one of those less mature ones, before I understood my impact on others. …
The Best Time is Now: Turning Regret into Resolve
Have you ever regretted doing something, even long after you did it, and can never undo it? Then, not only regret the action, but also the amount of time you spent not doing anything about it. Yes, the best time to have corrected your mistake might be just after it happened, but for any number of reasons, that didn’t happen.
I still remember …
The Freedom Of Attitude
My dear husband is a kvetcher. He claims it as a birth rite. At least he has an excuse.
I’m not a kvetcher, but I can get my shirt in a knot over things that haven’t even happened, and probably never will. I worry. Worrying puts me in a particularly negative frame of mind, so that I go into a situation expecting the worst.
Viktor Frankl spoke often of a basic freedom we humans have, …
From Cluttered to Clear: Creating Room for Life's Surprises
When I sold my house and moved into what many thought of as a spacious apartment, I had to downsize by two thirds. And still, every millimeter of that apartment was stuffed with my belongings.
I used to regularly carry a purse. That purse, no matter how big, was always overfilled. …
Striking a Balance: Embracing Hope While Managing Expectations
In a week, I’ll spend a day reviewing the past year and setting my intentions for the new year. In looking back over the year, I began it with hopes for the future and expectations on what that future would be like.
My hope was that I would be challenged and be able to meet those challenges. …
Doing Nothing Effectively
A number of years ago now, my supervisor challenged me to go to a park bench and sit there for 2 hours. No reading. No planning. No inner story-telling. No fidgeting. … No texting.
Do nothing for 2 hours. She may have actually said 4 hours. It didn’t matter, …
Crossing the Line: Understanding Boundaries and Bottom Lines
The other day, a dear friend and colleague of mine was accused of being unprofessional without any real data to back it up. My friend was upset enough to sever ties with that person.
Why? She did it because the accuser crossed a bottom line by questioning my friend’s professional competence. …
Round Peg in a Square Hole: The Quest for Authentic Success
Is it owning your own house? Raising children with a loving partner? Having those children grow into balanced and happy adults? Is it happiness for yourself? Or being successful in what you do for a living? Is it simply feeling that you’re a success?
Success has meant many different things …
Nature's Wisdom: Embracing Abundance Through Human Connection
I know I’ve been writing a lot lately on connection. Mostly, it’s because I see so little of it, and that makes me both sad and worried. We are social animals and we need to connect with other humans to survive. Yet we aren’t connecting very much. Instead we isolate and that makes us feel even worse. …
Watching is different than doing
I’ve noticed how expert I am, and others are, at seeing the flaws in others who are working at accomplishing something. It might be leading a group, or doing housework, or baking a cake, or crafting something new. I think there’s a term for it – armchair critic. Probably akin to backseat driver.
It’s easy to see the flaws,
The Courage to Stand Alone: Navigating Group Pressure and Personal Boundaries
Recently I witnessed an emotional altercation that involved group-think, sometimes referred to as confluence. The issue was whether to award a particular person for an achievement, or to award a different person. The person the members of this group wanted to award was a friend of theirs; the other person was not a friend of theirs
From Spectating to Participating: Breaking Free from the Sidelines
For a long time – longer than I care to admit – I would hold off saying what I really thought or felt. Instead, I would tell myself that I wanted to hear and sit with what someone said before making any comments. This wasn’t true with friends or family. It was true with teachers and strangers.
Will this time be different?
I’ve struggled with my weight all my adult life, believing I was too big and needed to lose just a little weight. Even though it’s only a little, that few pounds never stayed off, except when I was sick. And of course, the older I get, the harder it is for me to keep to a particular weight, even allowing for aging.
It’s suspicious.
The Ever-Evolving Quest for Perfection: Lessons from Personal Experiences
In my teens, I would spend many weekend hours sewing and creating for myself, my family and friends. I loved to do it; it fed my imagination and my sense of accomplishment. I recall one Christmas deciding to make a garment for my boyfriend. When I finished, I noticed a hole in the material, and spent the next 4 days meticulously creating a patch that became an art statement. That was a cherished moment for me: I’d elegantly solved a problem, and nobody but me knew it had ever been a problem.
For me, that’s perfection.
The Power of Anticipation: Building Resilience Through Dual Expectations
Plan for the worst, Expect the best. This is advice I give clients, and myself, all the time. Why? Because I tend to do the opposite and end up at minimum disappointed, and at worst, in shock and even trauma. “Opposite” isn’t quite what I used to expect: I wouldn’t expect the worst; as it turned out, I had things in the wrong order – I’d expect the best without any real consideration, then plan accordingly. In addition, I’d expect everything and everyone except me to be perfection, then spend all my waking moments worrying over how I could mess it all up.
Unseen Connections: The Role of Feedback in Human Visibility
I was moved to write about human visibility today, when I came across a quote from Virginia Woolf from her novel A ROOM OF ONE’S OWN: For there is a spot the size of a shilling at the back of the head which one can never see for oneself.
It was likely because I had only recently said something abruptly to another person without knowing it, until a colleague pointed out the impact it had on her as an observer.
The Art Of Keeping It Simple
Keep it simple!
That small three-word imperative is like a tautology – it covers many, many things. For instance, keeping it simple can help you understand something better, or clarify your thinking around an issue; it might help you sort through how you feel about a personal problem. It can significantly impact how and where you live, right down to how you choose your friends and food.
In science, there’s an elegance to keeping it simple
A Hundred Things To Do
What is it about the week before going anywhere? All of a sudden, I am run off my feet with a hundred things to do so that by the time the trip begins, I’m in need of rest.
Does that feel familiar in your own life? A friend mentioned that in passing. We chuckled when I said it seems to be a common trait among people who think too much. It may be a go-to for us;
Authenticity in Action: Fostering a Culture of Respect and Empowerment
“I’m a people pleaser.” … “ I’d rather not rock the boat.” … “You’re the boss, not me.” … “I don’t feel safe here and would rather not speak up.” … “Am I going to be ridiculed if I say anything?”
These are things we might say if we either don’t want to get involved, or fear repercussions if we do get involved. We simply want to keep our heads down and get through the day in one piece.